Rough water

 I love to swim.  Here in Kona I swim from the pier and follow some buoys that are set about 1/4 mile apart. I LOVE to swim when the water is calm like a mirror and I think about God and his wonderful good creation as I glide through the water.  I usually avoid the ocean when it is choppy as the waves splash salt water in your mouth when you try to breath and it is a lot of work.

A few weeks ago I had been praying and felt very close to God before I went down to swim. When I got there the water was very choppy.  There was a big surge which is the huge surfing waves that roll in from distant storms.  Those waves were coming in from the South. There were big surface waved left over from a storm the night before. Those waves were coming in from the South West. Then there was a pretty good wind kicking up the tops of the other waves from the North. This meant that not only was the water very rough but that there was no rhythm or pattern.  Normally there would be no way that I would swim on such a day.  In fact there were only three other swimmers getting ready to go. (Usually there are a dozen or so swimmers at any one time.) 

I was feeling so connected to God that I got the message to go and swim anyway and have no fear.  I swam along completely relaxed and continued to think about God.  To my surprise I felt like I was gilding through the water as if it was flat. When I turned to go back at the 1.2 mile turn around it was amazing fun to go with the waves back home.  It was like one of the best carnival rides.  I had so much fun.  One of my best swims ever! The other three swimmers were rinsing the salt water off when I went to the shower.  One man was telling the couple that he had only gone to the 1/2 mile because it was so rough.  They said they had gone to the 1.2 turn around as I had and he told them that they were awesome.

The point is not that I had such a wonderful swim but that I learned to not be afraid of rough water. We see problems coming at us from lots of different sources and we try to go it alone and show that we are strong swimmers.  We wear out at the 1/2 mile like the man at the showers.  But if we relax because we know that we are going with God we not only can go far we can have a good time doing it. Don't worry about troubles (rough water).  Just say to God, "I am going to have fun going with you and I can't wait to see your grace expressed here."

Go with God and have fun.

Watching Rainbows

This morning I was watching rainbows. The rain was on the ocean and the sun rose over Hualalai Mountain making the perfect condition for rainbows.  The clouds were white and puffy overhead with blue sky peeking through so I
watched a beautiful arch reach to the clouds on my right then another stream of color leaped from the ocean to disappear into the clouds on my left. Both were the landed feet of the same arch with blue sky and puffy white clouds forming the apex.

 




This made me think how we are part of the same rainbow. God's light shines through us and we reflect back glorious color. The right side of the bow this morning was busy shining on the town giving the clustered roofs a special glory.  The left side of the arch touched the ocean, far down the coast, which had the grace to reflect it back from the mirrored water and begin to complete the circle. From the two shimmering sides of the rainbow I could know where the top would be even if the blue and white of cloud and sky didn't didn't refract the full range of the visual pallet.  I knew it was there.

 You and me, we are all part of the same rainbow.  You are there with your amazing colors shining    and I are here, reflecting off the ocean.  Those we don't see now are up in the blue and white where our limited human vision doesn't see but God's glorious arch shows us that the bow is there.

Often we just look at rainbows.  This is  rainbows watching.

Beyond words

Beyond Words                                                                                          9-10-2014

I want to reach to meanings beyond words.

Words jail knowledge

Into neat packages

Like processed food on the grocery shelf

Tasty but with the nutrition sucked out.

A label for everything,

A category for every bug and bird

Building and grain of sand.

If it is new, undiscovered,

Previously unidentified

And thus not found in dictionaries,

Catalogues, or on the internet,

Then make a new word

To control the new thing

And don’t let it escape again

Into the realm of the unknown.

Capture all with words,

Forged in the past

With steel bands of tradition

And the ball and chain of history

Dragging meaning backwards.

But the unknown

 Is more than the known,

And I am caged by words

That keep me safe

From the brittleness of the inexpressible.

I am captured by my culture

By my planet

By the stars in the Milky Way.

Yet I suspect

That if I let go of words

The world inside a raindrop

Would let me in.

broken heart

 What Do I Do With This Broken Human Heart?

By Kit Kurtz  8-29-2014

What do I do with this human heart?

     It               is             broken.

One day he walked into a hospital

on the other side of this sphere we call Earth.

I was not with him.

At the end of the day

The morsel of cake he was eating

The sip of juice he drank

The doctor’s best efforts

And all the machines

that building had

Could not

make him stay

in Earths gravity

and he floated off

without me.

He was my best friend.

He was my husband.

He was my life partner

But now that promise,

along with others made,

is broken.

Now,

What do I do with this broken heart?

I tried to bury it.

Deep

 in a place where I thought

I couldn’t find it again,

And live free from pain or hurt.

But my heart is not dead,

And it won’t stay buried

like a dead thing should.

It is just a broken human heart.

I tried to mend it.

I am good at mending.

Human stitches for a human heart.

First forgiving.

To polish away

The patina of old hurts

And wipe clean the newly discovered mud.

Next releasing.

Wondering and watching,

while sitting still on a paddle board,

Why does the thing I just dropped,

in the ocean by my side,

Float away from me.

I wanted it by me.

No.

It must go on its own path.

He and I are on our own journeys.

This is not new news,

just the intertwining

is now released

And the currents take us separately.

Then acceptance.

Neither of us is distant from God.

Neither of us has less

Of joy

Or love

Or even life.

So what do I do with this human heart

That hides in dark corners

To grab at my ankles

As I walk past,

Full of the purpose

of a new life,

And tries to trip up

my progress.

Crying to me,

“You can’t go on so fast.

Can’t you see?

I hide here broken.

You MUST care for me.

You must be governed by me.

You can’t be whole when I am broken.”

I stumble.

I look and think

That I am no longer whole.

I tell myself that it is OK to cry.

I have the right to be sad.

And that is surely true

if a human heart

governed me.

But angels still sing

behind my eyes

And in my heart

is joy.

Why?

I remember who I am.

Nothing I have done,

Nothing I have experienced,

has ever been

Separate from

Love,

God.

The expression of life

That seemed to be a flow of human years,

Traveling together with him

To see the beauty

This earth has to offer,

Making a family

To share all we had,

Growing better at

being, and listening and loving.

All this,

Was the expression of God’s being.

Love always guided,

And kept us like a pearl,

The irritating human grain of sand

Gaining layer after layer

of beautiful caring

Showing us

the impossibility

of irritation, anger, misunderstanding.

All that happened was God

Being just God

The peaceful walks

Along the lake

Through the city

Under the holy dome

Up the mountain slope

Showed the wonders of Soul.

The urgent discussions

With quick wit

Nurturing new ideas

Discarding paradigms

like worn out cloths

Indicated only that Mind

was there to inspire.

The joy of growth,

A daughter,

A son,

Bringing unthought blessing,

And laughter at things

 that were never before funny,

Proved Life to be the master creator.

The frustration,

The fight to find what was

honest, sane, or real,

Forced Spirit to be our guide,

And loose hold on

The world’s easy solutions.

Compelling us to

Turn our back on

The partial good or evil

The world eagerly offers

And reach for the crystal clear

truth of Principle.

So what do I do with this broken human heart?

Nothing.

My heart is not human.

It is part of the whole of Love

I listen and know

That Christ comes,

Always,

“To heal the brokenhearted.”

I go with a whole heart.